How to Do To-Don’t

Last week’s post sparked some interesting conversations. True, the To-Don’t list is FAR harder than a to-do list. That is why you have likely never heard of it. It is so hard it is rare. Most leaders nod along when we talk about the importance of a to-do list. Few have even heard about a to-don’t list. Fewer yet are clear about what actually goes on one. A serious to-don’t list is not a collection of bad habits or obvious waste. It is a list of things that are often reasonable, sometimes successful, and occasionally even admirable—but no longer deserve your time, attention, or authority.

In discussing this last week, it seems to-don’t list items fall into at least three categories.

1. Things the future will not demand

Some activities don’t belong on the to-don’t list because they are wrong. They belong there because the future has moved on.

Apple is a classic example. Over time, the company eliminated floppy drives, CD/DVD drives, Ethernet ports, and eventually the headphone jack. None of these decisions were popular in the moment. Each removal generated criticism and inconvenience. But Apple understood something many leaders struggle with: optimizing your past slows down your future.

optimizing your past slows down your future.

The to-don’t list often includes work that exists primarily to serve yesterday’s assumptions. Legacy reports that no one reads but everyone expects. Standing meetings that have lost their value. Approval layers designed for a slower, lower-trust organization.

In healthcare, education, and business, this shows up as processes that were once necessary for safety or compliance but have quietly become performative. Leaders keep them because “we’ve always done it this way,” not because they actually improve outcomes.

2. Things that no longer serve you

Some items on the to-don’t list once worked exceptionally well. They may even be the reason you’re in your current role.

But Marshall Goldsmith famously captured it: what got you here won’t get you there. Early success often comes from personal drive, technical excellence, and sheer effort. But those same behaviors can become liabilities as the scope of leadership expands.

A leader who built credibility by being the smartest person in the room eventually needs to stop answering every question. A leader who earned trust by fixing problems personally must stop being the fixer. A leader who built momentum through responsiveness must learn when quick responses are not best and --even more--when not to respond.

I’ve seen (been) senior leaders continue to run meetings they no longer need to run, weigh in on decisions their teams are fully capable of making, or stay deeply involved in operational details long after their role requires strategic focus. None of this is incompetence. It’s habit.

The to-don’t list is an act of maturity. It says: This worked once. It does not serve me—or the organization—now. Letting go here often feels like loss. In reality, it creates room for others to grow and for the leader to do the work only they can do.

In reality, the to-don't list creates room for others to grow and for the leader to do the work only they can do.

3. Things that are good—but lose the time battle

This may be the most painful category.

Some things belong on the to-don’t list not because they are wrong or outdated, but because they lose the prioritization war. They are good, worthwhile, even meaningful—but not the best use of a leader’s limited time.

Imagine an executive who loves mentoring individual staff members. It’s valuable work. It builds loyalty. It feels deeply aligned with purpose. But if that same executive is postponing difficult decisions about funding, structure, or partnerships, mentoring becomes a way of avoiding the harder work.

Or consider a leader who attends every committee meeting “to stay connected.” Each meeting is reasonable. Taken together, they crowd out the thinking time required to address workforce burnout or redesign care delivery.

The to-don’t list forces leaders to acknowledge that time is a zero-sum game. Saying yes to something good often means saying no to something essential. This is where discipline—not motivation—does the heavy lifting.

Saying yes to something good often means saying no to something essential.

Transformative leaders regularly prune many good things so they can focus on the most important good thing.

A real to-don’t list is not about doing less for the sake of doing less. It is about knowing what most needs done and getting other stuff out of the way.

It requires leaders to stop confusing busyness with value.

The paradox remains. Stopping often looks like retreat. But over time, it is how leaders move forward—toward work that matters, toward organizations that can lead without them everywhere, and toward a future that demands clarity more than activity.

Peter Drucker famously said, "I have never encountered an executive who remains effective while tackling more than two tasks at a time."

The question is not whether you can add one more thing. It’s whether you can you identify the main thing and stop the rest.

As a jazz friend of mine liked to say, "the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing."

You'll need a to-don't list for that.